Beauty

I had nothing to wear.

Well, that’s not entirely true. I had nothing appropriate to wear.

After all, I spend my days at home with my children. Hardly a reason for one to pull out dress clothes. In fact, once I knew, for sure, that returning to full time work wasn’t anywhere in my near future, I cleared out my huge selection of business and dress clothes.

So, with the exception of a handful of Sunday morning dresses, I didn’t have anything considered “gala worthy.”

For three hours, I searched the mall. There wasn’t much of a selection there, either. It was impossible to find anything remotely near my taste or comfort level – which has changed significantly over the last ten years.

Every dress looked as if it was made for high school prom or the mother of the groom, and I’m smack dab in the middle of those stages.

I tried on dresses for hours, and even dared to try on a few pairs of pants. But after no success, the only good thing from my exploration was a couple of sweatshirts.

Insecurity has colored much of my life, especially in moments that require excess. Oh, and bathing suit season. I’ve spent much time believing that if my eyebrows were thinner, or thicker, I’d be more beautiful. Or if only I had long, dark, wavy hair. Or if my eye lashes were actually visible without layers of mascara. If I’d been given a few more shades of pigment in my skin or could rearrange my shape a bit so there was less at the bottom and more up top, I’d have it made.

But the older I get, I’ve come to realize that the world’s standard of beauty always changes. Just like fashion.  And it’s impossible to keep up with. Quite expensive and time consuming, too.

“Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes.  You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God.  This is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful.” (1 Peter 3:3-5)… “For women who claim to be devoted to God should make themselves attractive by the good things they do.” (1 Timothy 2:10)

God’s standard of beauty never changes. It has been the same from the start. And, what a relief, that it has nothing to do with the standards the world imposes. In fact, it doesn’t say a thing about trends or diets or workout routines. Rather, it lifts the burden society imposes and frees us up to spend our time, money, and efforts in a manner that glorifies God and echoes throughout eternity.

Mere hours before the event, I found a dress on a clearance rack in small store’s going out of business sale. And you know what, not a single person at the event asked me about it. No one seemed concerned with what I had on, or from where it was purchased. And the two hours I spent putting on makeup and curling my hair quickly washed down the drain before I slipped into my comfy and worn pajamas for a good night’s sleep. None of it lasted long. It was a whole lot of work for a very short about of time.

I don’t know about you, but it’s God’s word that brings me great relief, reminding me of where to place my focus – and that’s not in a mirror. If, like me, you’ve struggled with your image, take heart. The beauty of your service, of your actions, of your spirit is what is highly valued in God’s eyes. It is a beauty that will far outlast our ever-changing vessels and make an eternal impact on the world around us.