rushing & wishing to resting & waiting
It’s been a problem most of my life. I’m not even sure how it started.
Or why or when.
Maybe it’s just my nature. Or maybe it’s just human nature.
Towards the end of my sophomore year of high school, I decided I wanted to graduate early. I was more than ready to move on to bigger and better things in life, never mind the fact that I wasn’t even sixteen. and wouldn’t become an officially licensed driver until the week before my junior year.
And that would be my last year of high school.
Looking back now, I can hardly believe my parents agreed to allow their baby child to step into an adult world as a minor. But even though they gave me the reins on decision making, I’m confident they probably prayed with more diligence than ever that I would come to my senses and change my mind.
Long story short, I did. After wrestling with the decision for months on end, I finally withdrew my intent and was flooded with overwhelming peace. Turns out, my senior year of high school was one of the best years of my life, and I’m so thankful I didn’t rush past it and miss it.
But the lesson wasn’t learned.
I continued the trend of wishing my years away and rushing through each one to get to the next thing. Romanticizing whatever might come, as if the current season held no value.
Maybe you’re like me. Ready to move on, to achieve what’s next, to mark that goal off the list yesterday.
Yet over the last seven years, God has been transforming me from a life of wishing and rushing to one of resting and waiting.
Because here’s the thing: seasons change. Time does pass. Yet we can only move forward, never back. And if we believe that God’s plans are perfect, that His timing is accurate, and His ways a good, then we can trust that all of our days are valuable – especially the ones in which we’re currently residing.
Hindsight has proven that I’ve already lived some of my best days, I just didn’t realize it at the time. And as God has been faithful to endow me with much needed perspective, I do wish I could go back and savor what I rushed to get through and wished would pass.
So these days, I’m content to rest fully in this current season and wait until He moves me to the next.
Because I know that right now, He is doing a great work. I know that He is using these present circumstances and situations to refine and mature me in necessary ways so I’ll be prepared for what’s to come. And I’ll be of more use to His kingdom. After all, He sees the full picture and has already written out the entire plan.
And I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to miss a moment of what God is doing – not now, not ever.
“We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. In him, our hearts rejoice, for we trust in His holy name. May your unfailing love rest upon us, O Lord, even as we put our hope in you.” – Psalm 33:20-22
