Together
I made him pray before we hugged them goodbye because I knew I couldn’t keep it together.
This was a joyous moment. The last thing I wanted to do was taint it with my tears. Because it wasn’t about me. The goal set before us had been successfully accomplished, and it was a great cause for celebration!
We sat down for lunch, the two of us, and ordered a large bowl of chips and queso. Two full entrees. And cake. A big slice of tres leches cake.
Not our typical lunch.
“Well, we made it.” We both breathed out a sigh of relief, finally aware of the mounting stress that had been pressing in on us.
“The girls did so well, didn’t they? I’m really proud of them.” He scooped a chip through the bowl of melted cheese between us. I followed suit.
“I am, too.” I blinked back the moisture clouding my eyes. “I suppose the best way to avoid crying is to be in public, huh?”
“Yeah,” he laughed and patted my hand. The conversation stayed short and light. The waitress arrived with our food. We maintained composure.
“Since I prayed back there, you get to pray for our lunch.” He wrapped his fingers around mine.
I closed my eyes and filled my lungs, “Dear God, we thank you for being so good to us…”
That was all I had. My words failed as tears streamed. I just nodded my head, knowing God understood our hearts despite the absence of words.
He stayed silent. Almost. A sniff gave him away.
What else could I say? There was so much going on in my mind and heart, but that was all I could come up with.
“… okay. Amen.”
Our heads shot up and we reached for the pile of napkins on the corner of the table. Why did we think coming to a restaurant was a good idea? We should’ve ordered lunch to go. If anyone asked, we’d blame it on the jalapeno ranch dip.
“Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor…” – Ecclesiastes 4:9
We’re coming up on our tenth anniversary. The busiest ten years of my life, no doubt. So much has taken place that I now struggle to remember if certain events occurred before we met or after. Because at this point, it feels like it was just yesterday and yet, has always been.
I remember snippets of advice we received leading up to our wedding. Things like: don’t ever go to bed angry. Or, don’t stop dating one another. Truth be told, we’ve had our fair share of moments where the covers were pulled up in the silence and tension of a dark room. And, after having kids, outings took a back seat.
Of course, those pieces of advice were helpful, but they didn’t really do much to deepen our marriage. We eventually learned the art of communication and the beauty of true forgiveness. And we also learned that watching 90s sitcoms in bed with a bowl of homemade popcorn stuck between us absolutely counted as a date.
But what really did it for us, what strengthened and grew our marriage were two things no one ever told us to pursue: service and hardship.
That has been the glue that has bonded us. Because as we’ve chosen to serve God side by side, to step out of our comfort zones and pursue difficult tasks together, we quickly realized how much we depend on one another. How much we need one another. And how we’re highly effective as a team. Much more so than when we did things on our own.
But we also learned the truth that “though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” (Ecclesiastes 4:12)
And that has been the biggest blessing in it all. Through tears and struggles, triumphs and trials, laughter and celebration, God’s presence has only strengthened the cord. In moments where it felt all was unraveling, He bound us tightly together.
Like on that day. Last Monday as we seasoned our lunch with tears. We knew were going to be okay. Because we have one another. And God has us.
Just as we committed all those years ago – to have, and to hold, until death do us part.
And even then, God will have us still.
