Reason #750

Today was a good day. A really, really good day. I am proud to say that I finished my first audit, which I started to think was never going to happen. I only worked on it for two weeks, but it seems like I've been working on it since I moved departments. Anyway, it was reviewed with minimum critiques, and I wondered why I wasn't this successful with audit in school. I took audit during my last semester, 5 years ago, and I'll admit I was pretty lost. I felt confident during class, but when the tests rolled around, I managed to barely squeak by on most of them. Somehow, it has all come back to me now and I really can't believe it's clicking this well. Maybe I was just over thinking it then, or maybe it just took that long for the information to actually set it. Anyway, I came home feeling quite accomplished and successful. Two weeks ago, I knew absolutely nothing about the process I just finished auditing. I'm no expert now, but I gained a lot of knowledge and actually understood it. It was like I passed my first test, and I was a good feeling.

I walked into the bedroom, excited to tell Aaron that my first audit was now complete. He's had to hear all about it for the past two weeks, too, so I am sure he was relieved I was finally done. Anyway, I looked over at my nightstand and noticed a little display of Valentine's goodies. Of course, if you read my blog a few days ago, you know I'm not sold on Valentine's. I think it's kind of superficial (sorry, if it's your favorite holiday). And so I told him not to get me anything for Valentine's. Less pressure, less stress, and everyone is satisfied. I picked up the card, and on the side he had written me an explanation for this loving display. He knew how I felt about Valentine's Day, and so he dubbed February 13th as 'Brittnye Appreciation Day.' That way, I could feel special and loved not because everyone else is feeling that way, and not because it's expected, but because I really am. I definitely appreciated that!

So here's the thing, I definitely feel most special when it's all about me. I know that sounds really selfish, so let me explain. When Aaron's attention is completely on me, when I am holding all of his interest, I feel most loved. The truth is, I don't want to share him. That's one of the many reasons I married him. I wanted him for myself. And so when Aaron goes out of his way to make me feel like I am the only person in the world that matters, when he focuses his time and energy on me, I feel loved.

I think about the Lord and the fact that He's taking care of all of us at the same time. He is focusing His time, energy, and efforts on each one of His children, and yet somehow, He makes me feel like I am His one and only. It amazes me that He can do that and not get distracted or bogged down. When I am at His feet, it's like I am the only one He has ears for. When I call on His name, it's like He has no where else to spend His time except on me. And I am so grateful for that. I am grateful that even though His children are in the millions, He still makes me feel like His one and only. I am grateful that, even though He's sharing Himself with us all, we're each getting all of Him. For His full attention and His constant awareness, I am grateful. And even though He holds the whole world in His hands, I am glad that He always finds a way to let me know that He notices me.

#750 - Because He notices us individually even when He's holding us all in His hands.

"O Lord, what are human beings that you should notice them, mere mortals that you should think about them?" - Psalm 144:3
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Reason #751

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Reason #749