Reason #809
Some situations really make me angry. The kind of angry that, no matter how you act, you don't feel any better. You can get mad and yell. You can kick, scream, and throw things. You can silently boil. And yet regardless, you're still mad. Mad at someone else, mad at yourself, and just plain mad about the whole situation.
I had one of those situations today. I wanted to blow a fuse, and I was so mad I could hardly think straight. I was "unprepared," completely believing that everything was going to go just as planned and then it didn't. Not that I can't go with the flow now and then, it just really depends on what the flow is doing. In this case, the flow was not cooperating and didn't cooperate with me yesterday, and so I had had it. I figured if I let go of Plan A and went to Plan B, things would be okay. But Plan B failed, which in turn will appear to be my failure, and had I known that all along, I wouldn't have even gone this route. But you know what they say. You live and you learn, and I have learned that I will never again put myself in this role.
Now, I would be more specific about my angry situation, but if I told you the whole scenario you'd probably just laugh and say, "I'm sorry! That is funny though. Don't worry about it. It's not a big deal." And it's not. It's not life nor death nor anything that will even matter this time next month. It's silly and irrelevant and has no significant impact on the world what so ever. But it is one of those things that easily ruined my day, and I am having an extremely hard time letting it go.
I know we always say things like, "You're the only one who decides how you're going to react here." Or, "You have the power to keep this from ruining your day." Because, sure, we're all responsible for how we react and how we let things affect us. But notice that the people who say this are not the people who aren't upset. And notice that those people don't always live by the same rules when their day has been ruined by a disappointing event. And so in these moments when we know the truth but have a hard time living it out, what do we do?
I don't have a good answer here. When these situations are put into perspective, or after a little time has passed, you look back and think, "Wow, why did I get so upset about that?" But that's just how humans are. Mostly irrational and slightly insane sometimes. And yet, doesn't it amaze you that God still loves us? That despite our crazy, melodramatic ways, He still cares for us. Regardless of how unreasonable we are being, or how ridiculous we may act, He still calls us His own.
The more I learn about myself, and the more I learn about Jesus, the more I realize how desperately I need Him. Because it's not necessarily the storms that always give me a run for my money, it's the little incidents here and there that throw me for a loop. The little incidents that remind me that I am in great need of God's grace, forgiveness, mercy and patience. And as I often times fail to show those things to others, I am even more grateful that God never fails to show them to me. I am a work in progress, as life daily reminds me, and I am glad I serve a God who won't stop working on me until I'm standing before Him perfectly whole and complete.
#809 - Because He'll keep working on us.
"But God had mercy on me so that Christ Jesus could use me as a prime example of his great patience with even the worst sinners. Then others will realize that they, too, can believe in him and receive eternal life." - 1 Timothy 1:16
I had one of those situations today. I wanted to blow a fuse, and I was so mad I could hardly think straight. I was "unprepared," completely believing that everything was going to go just as planned and then it didn't. Not that I can't go with the flow now and then, it just really depends on what the flow is doing. In this case, the flow was not cooperating and didn't cooperate with me yesterday, and so I had had it. I figured if I let go of Plan A and went to Plan B, things would be okay. But Plan B failed, which in turn will appear to be my failure, and had I known that all along, I wouldn't have even gone this route. But you know what they say. You live and you learn, and I have learned that I will never again put myself in this role.
Now, I would be more specific about my angry situation, but if I told you the whole scenario you'd probably just laugh and say, "I'm sorry! That is funny though. Don't worry about it. It's not a big deal." And it's not. It's not life nor death nor anything that will even matter this time next month. It's silly and irrelevant and has no significant impact on the world what so ever. But it is one of those things that easily ruined my day, and I am having an extremely hard time letting it go.
I know we always say things like, "You're the only one who decides how you're going to react here." Or, "You have the power to keep this from ruining your day." Because, sure, we're all responsible for how we react and how we let things affect us. But notice that the people who say this are not the people who aren't upset. And notice that those people don't always live by the same rules when their day has been ruined by a disappointing event. And so in these moments when we know the truth but have a hard time living it out, what do we do?
I don't have a good answer here. When these situations are put into perspective, or after a little time has passed, you look back and think, "Wow, why did I get so upset about that?" But that's just how humans are. Mostly irrational and slightly insane sometimes. And yet, doesn't it amaze you that God still loves us? That despite our crazy, melodramatic ways, He still cares for us. Regardless of how unreasonable we are being, or how ridiculous we may act, He still calls us His own.
The more I learn about myself, and the more I learn about Jesus, the more I realize how desperately I need Him. Because it's not necessarily the storms that always give me a run for my money, it's the little incidents here and there that throw me for a loop. The little incidents that remind me that I am in great need of God's grace, forgiveness, mercy and patience. And as I often times fail to show those things to others, I am even more grateful that God never fails to show them to me. I am a work in progress, as life daily reminds me, and I am glad I serve a God who won't stop working on me until I'm standing before Him perfectly whole and complete.
#809 - Because He'll keep working on us.
"But God had mercy on me so that Christ Jesus could use me as a prime example of his great patience with even the worst sinners. Then others will realize that they, too, can believe in him and receive eternal life." - 1 Timothy 1:16