Reason #856
I got a new phone yesterday. It showed that I had over 300 unread emails, which was actually less than I thought. I am the world's worst about clearing out emails. That's the sentimental side of me. I hang on to emails that I have received from friends and family, and I always keep any emails offering a good deal in case I ever decide to pursue it. Well, my emails dated back to 2010, and so I figured I would take some time to go through and delete them. It was a little walk down memory lane, and I have to say I am glad I took the time to do so.
I keep seeing these pictures of kids posted on Facebook showing their first day of school and their last day of school. It is amazing how much they have grown and changed through the school year. And today, I kind of felt like that. Like I was looking back at old pictures of myself, and I was amazed at how much I have changed in four years.
A majority of the emails were from the end of 2011 through the middle of 2012. I took the time to read some of the emails in their entirety and I was blown away by what I had written. Each one filled with this raw desperation, pleading that God would change my circumstances. And I saw this girl who was filled with depression. A girl who was so fragile, so numb, and I couldn't even remember what it felt like to feel that way. I could hardly believe I lived like that for months on end. And each email revealed how devastated and heartbroken I was. Yet with every email, I talked about how I was really trusting that God was going to do something with this mess I was in, and almost every response I got was, "Don't give up. Don't stop trying." And so I didn't. Even when I wanted to give up, when I wanted to curl up and die, I never stopped trying.
But what if I had? What if I had stopped trying? What if I had given up early on? What if I hadn't fought hard and believed God's promises with every fiber of my being? Well, I don't know where I'd be today. I don't know how differently my life would look. But I'm glad I didn't stop. I am glad I didn't give up. And sure, when I felt like I was being given up on, I really wasn't. Because as I looked back, I saw that God's faithfulness never stopped. God's provision, His guidance, His love, and His comfort constantly continued. And God never gave up on me, either. Every day, He filled my lungs with air, giving me another chance, and I am so thankful for that. Thankful that no matter how far gone things seemed, God never gave up on me.
It was a good reminder. There were many moments that tears filled my eyes with gratitude for not only what God brought me through but for how He transformed my life. I was amazed at the love that was poured out on me at a time where I felt most unloved. It was so sweet to look back at the girl I was then, compared to the girl I am now, and see how much I have grown, changed, and learned. Something I could have never accomplished on my own, but thanks to the Lord, I made it through.
So don't give up on God because He isn't going to give up on you. Even if it seems desperate or impossible, well just hang in there. It doesn't matter if you're hanging on with a death grip or simply by a thread, hold tight. Trust that God will take care of you. Trust that He won't let you drown in your sorrows. Trust that He will pull you up, hold you up, and restore you. Don't give up on yourself, and don't give up on God. Take Him at His word and believe that He never fails, never has, and He never will. You'll see it, trust me. One day you will look back and you'll be amazed at how far you've come. Keep pressing on and run with all your might towards Jesus. He works miracles!
#856 - Because He won't give up on us if we won't give up on Him.
"So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised." - Hebrews 10:35-36
I keep seeing these pictures of kids posted on Facebook showing their first day of school and their last day of school. It is amazing how much they have grown and changed through the school year. And today, I kind of felt like that. Like I was looking back at old pictures of myself, and I was amazed at how much I have changed in four years.
A majority of the emails were from the end of 2011 through the middle of 2012. I took the time to read some of the emails in their entirety and I was blown away by what I had written. Each one filled with this raw desperation, pleading that God would change my circumstances. And I saw this girl who was filled with depression. A girl who was so fragile, so numb, and I couldn't even remember what it felt like to feel that way. I could hardly believe I lived like that for months on end. And each email revealed how devastated and heartbroken I was. Yet with every email, I talked about how I was really trusting that God was going to do something with this mess I was in, and almost every response I got was, "Don't give up. Don't stop trying." And so I didn't. Even when I wanted to give up, when I wanted to curl up and die, I never stopped trying.
But what if I had? What if I had stopped trying? What if I had given up early on? What if I hadn't fought hard and believed God's promises with every fiber of my being? Well, I don't know where I'd be today. I don't know how differently my life would look. But I'm glad I didn't stop. I am glad I didn't give up. And sure, when I felt like I was being given up on, I really wasn't. Because as I looked back, I saw that God's faithfulness never stopped. God's provision, His guidance, His love, and His comfort constantly continued. And God never gave up on me, either. Every day, He filled my lungs with air, giving me another chance, and I am so thankful for that. Thankful that no matter how far gone things seemed, God never gave up on me.
It was a good reminder. There were many moments that tears filled my eyes with gratitude for not only what God brought me through but for how He transformed my life. I was amazed at the love that was poured out on me at a time where I felt most unloved. It was so sweet to look back at the girl I was then, compared to the girl I am now, and see how much I have grown, changed, and learned. Something I could have never accomplished on my own, but thanks to the Lord, I made it through.
So don't give up on God because He isn't going to give up on you. Even if it seems desperate or impossible, well just hang in there. It doesn't matter if you're hanging on with a death grip or simply by a thread, hold tight. Trust that God will take care of you. Trust that He won't let you drown in your sorrows. Trust that He will pull you up, hold you up, and restore you. Don't give up on yourself, and don't give up on God. Take Him at His word and believe that He never fails, never has, and He never will. You'll see it, trust me. One day you will look back and you'll be amazed at how far you've come. Keep pressing on and run with all your might towards Jesus. He works miracles!
#856 - Because He won't give up on us if we won't give up on Him.
"So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised." - Hebrews 10:35-36