Reason #881

Failure, it's my fear. I'm afraid of failing, of being seen as a failure. Sometimes I fear of failing as a wife, a worker, a friend, as His servant. And just the other day, as I sat at my desk and began to realize the impact fear has had on my life, I wondered what it would be like to never be afraid.

What would you do if you knew you'd never fail? What if you knew you'd fail, would you still do it? What if you knew before you even started it that it wouldn't work out? What if there was a slight chance you would succeed? Would you try? Would you be afraid to try? What if you lived your life free of fear? Fearlessly? Would it look any different than it does right now? Would you have made the choices you've made thus far? What if you never knew what if was like to be afraid?

I walk this fine line between letting fear move me to premature action and keeping me paralyzed. It seems like those are the only two options sometimes, and I never know which one to choose. But there are times when you let fear dictate what your next move is only to realize that you ended up choosing the wrong option. Failure, that's exactly what it seems you're left with. A failed marriage, a failed career, a failed attempt at whatever it was you were going for. And I don't know about you, but there's nothing worse than picking up the pieces of your failure. Each piece, slicing your fingers with the reminder that it didn't work out. Cutting deep, etching the harsh reality into your heart and mind. And you wonder why. You regret ever making the decision you did. But you can't take it back, you can't change it now, and I've learned that when you're at the point of utter desperation and brokenness, the best thing to do is let God use you.

Pretty much every Sunday morning that Aaron and I lead our Sunday school class, I am reminded of the beauty and blessings of failure. Because had I never experienced failure, I wouldn't have the life I have today. I wouldn't have Aaron, I would have my friends, I wouldn't be teaching Sunday school class, and I wouldn't have just gotten back from Guatemala. I wouldn't have had any reason to ever start a blog 881 days ago, and I wouldn't have experienced the Lord in so many incredible ways had my life been nothing but an overwhelming success. Because, you see, it's in our failures that the Lord can do the most. Like Paul said, in our weakness, His strength is made perfect. In my weakness, His strength is magnified. Sometimes failure is really the start of it all, and sometimes failure is really just the turning point.

God's people have always needed Him. Always will. And at their moment of complete failure, of desperation and brokenness, God has used it as a platform to do incredible things in their lives. He still does. And when you allow God to use your biggest failures, you quickly realize they become your biggest successes. The very things that seemed broken beyond repair are now redeemed in ways you never imagined. So don't be afraid to act. Don't be afraid to take a step. Because whether it is a success or whether it is failure, God can do something with it. Trust Him with it, whatever the outcome. Let Him use it, and you'll look back see that when we place it in God's hands, He'll find a purpose for it.

#881 - Because He can turn our failures into successes!

"And may the Lord our God show us his approval and make our efforts successful. Yes, make our efforts successful!" - Psalm 90:17
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Reason #882

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Reason #880