Don’t believe the lie
“You’re not really dating material. You’re marriage material.”
I stared at the screen unsure how to respond. We were chatting via IM (on AOL, of course), as was a regular occurrence for the early 2000s. I had been carrying a torch for this particular boy for years. He knew it, and more often than not, gave me reason to believe his torch was burning for me, too.
The way he said the comment felt like a bad thing. A back handed compliment of some sort. If I was someone worth marrying, wouldn’t that make me someone worth dating? My young, innocent, naïve self couldn’t put the pieces of the puzzle together. Taking his words and actions to heart, I believed that I would always and forever be unwanted, thus leaving me unloved.
That lie followed me around for years. Long after we parted ways and nothing ever came from our nightly instant messenger chats, I couldn’t shake the comment. I had given such weight and stock to his words that every bit of rejection reinforced what I believed about myself.
The lie began burying itself deep in my heart, breeding fear and doubt. Those two lethal emotions developed into insecurity and desperation, leading me down a path of poor judgement until one day I was forced to confront the lie that was destroying my life.
God’s mercy brought me to the point where all of my fears and doubts were realized. The girl who was “marriage material” was no longer so. Feeling more unwanted and unloved than ever, God had my undivided attention to help me understand the truth I needed most.
“I have loved you with an everlasting love. With unfailing love, I have drawn you to myself. I will rebuild you, [Brittnye], you will again be happy and dance merrily…” (Jeremiah 31:3-4)
I had always been loved. I had always been wanted. But when I was looking for those desires to be fulfilled by a person, I was left disappointed.
Believing the truth of God’s words filled me with great peace and unexplainable joy. And the truth of His words gave me freedom to move forward in confidence because I knew how God felt about me and that’s what really mattered.
What lies are you believing about yourself, friend?
Unwanted?
Unlovable?
Unforgivable?
Unworthy?
Don’t believe the lie. Search out God’s truth and believe it. Because it’s there you will find exactly what you’ve always been looking for – truth that will fill you with life and joy and peace.
Jesus said to the people who believed in him, “You are truly my disciples if you remain faithful to my teachings. And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” John 8:31-32
